I think we all share such problematic traits to different degrees. It's important to realise that your introspection has already enabled you to realise your impulsivity and that's an important step. Remember, it is not your fault that you are prone to certain behaviours. So when those instances happen, don't kick yourself about it.
When it next happens, just try to nonjudgementally note to yourself, 'Ah, there it is.' I know it's hard in the moment, because your thinking will be clouded and emotions are strong, but use the moment as a mnemonic cue to 'wake up' while it's happening. If you manage to attain such mindfulness as your impulses kick in---rather than reflecting on the event afterwards---you have already improved yourself.
It's very much the principle in mindfulness meditation: to become aware of thoughts and emotions as they arise rather than realising after the fact. Most of the time we think without knowing that we are thinking. This default mode is what leads to many of our problems. But imagine being able to catch the moment a thought and an emotion arise; become aware of their incipience.
This means you become aware before the possibilities of consequent action. You suddenly seem to have a choice about what to do with them and whether or not you should act upon them. Give yourself time to think and breathe. Logic and reason will find a peaceful expression instead of the animalistic awkwardness where our primitive regions of the brain dictate and mindlessness rules.
You might even find the confidence and courage to speak about these matters with your father. You may candidly put it to him that people---including you and him---have this inconvenient way of being which can be remedied. Let him know there is another way. If he's defensive or sceptical that's okay. You may even decide to show him this thread to save you the hassle of remembering how you described a perceived problem and its responses with all the good points.
It is true that genes and life experiences undergird certain tendencies we have. But they are still only tendencies---not set in stone! They are acquired behaviours as the result of how your genome responds to sensory information about the world. Once you realise it, which you have done already, the world can be your oyster.
One is able to tweak or change one's default mode against genetic propensities because:
a) fortunately our brains possess the property of neuroplasticity; and ...
b) consciousness, in its simplest definition, is the knowing
of this and that---if you hear a bell, you know there is a bell sound (regardless of its cause or nature, be that an objective source such as a real bell or a neuronal misfiring that subjectively produced the sound as in the hallucination context).
The point with 'b' is, for anything to have a subjective existence, it has to be known
by a subject. If you experience something, you come to know of the experience's existence. The point with 'a' can be illustrated by this simple analogy: Just because your genes spell scoliosis doesn't mean you can't be a great athlete ... (Proof? Hussein Bolt.)
Albert Einstein's autopsy revealed that he had more glial cells in his brain than the norm. It is possible that he was born with that advantage, but since he was never the best at school, it is very likely that he 'grew' his brain throughout his life. Should he take credit for it? Yes and know. Yes because he had an insatiable motivation and thirst for knowledge. No because he was lucky to not have been throroughly discouraged or dissuaded from the scientific enterprise; also, he was lucky to have been born in Germany (instead of North Korea) and to have had to opportunity to travel the world.
Don't give yourself a hard time if your impulsivity gets the better of you again. The more you practise the game of mindfulness, the less they'll occur. It can even be fun! Undesired thoughts and emotions may still come, but they'll have less power over you once you see them as mere 'objects of consciousness'. Just interesting structures, as it were. They don't even have to be stopped (you can't). You may watch them come and go without reacting. If you dwell in anger and identify with it, it will last. Instead of the mental attitude being 'I am angry,' try 'There is anger.' Don't be led astray by angry narratives. You don't have to hold on to any thought, you don't have to do anything. Then you'll see that nothing is permanent. Both anger and its allure will pass. You'll see.
If you have an argument with someone, observe your own thoughts and feelings. Abandon the hope to win the argument at least for a moment. What's there in your mind? I'll tell you what will be immediately obvious: heart is pounding; you are hot and sweaty; there is a wish to catch your breath and yet a desire to get a word in as quickly as possible; you're angry (what does it feel like?); thoughts of thrashing your opponent emerge etc.
You don't have to react to any of this. You might even decide to tell your opponent, in passive resistance, that your are angry and feel like you need time to gather your thoughts in order to coherently express your opinion. Why not be honest, right? He can already see your unusually ruddy face and slight scowl. He might relate and cease to be an opponent.
If they are unreasonable just tell them how they are coming across to you and that perhaps you'll speak to them later when they've calmed down. If they stutter in frustration, show compassion---you've been there before. Tell them you get flustered too and a break is in order (both parties benefit).
The perfect recipe to build a psychosocial 'compass' might be the literary combination of two powerful subjects: Ethics and mindfulness. You may not agree with everything you read but you'll definitely learn a thing or two. Follow what you think is fair. No pressure and good luck.
You'll be alright, my friend.