I think you're putting too much pressure on yourself, and have mystical expectations on lucid dreaming. I bet that after your first LD you'll think "Ok so that's how it is, nothing fantastic actually". Maybe advanced LDs can feel fantastic, but I'm not there anyway. Now that I know better, I don't think lucid dreams have anything mystical/spiritual. Lucid or not, dreams are the creation of your unconscious mind (Freud).
If I were you, I'd stop having that objective of lucid dreaming, for now.
Let me tell you how I got there: About two months ago I began having dreams that were more vivid than usual: precise imagery, beautiful colors, ... I wrote them down on my smartphone, and they became a recurring thing. Whenever I would wake up in the night, I would make an effort and record a few keywords about the dream. This really improved my dream recall and their vividness.
Those vivid dreams will be good memories when you wake up. Who cares if you're not lucid, I totally agree with that. And from there on, we can talk about LDs again