lucidinthe sky wrote:But just becoming lucid has been really more effort than ability I think. I try not to think too much about how much effort and time I have put into the process vs. what I have gotten out of it. I have a success rate of about 1 in 30 or even 50 attempts at this point.
Believe me, I have gotten a lot out of it but the amount of effort and shear will power is exhausting for me. I just had my first LD in two months of working on it almost every night, sometimes for 2 or 3 hours. I was really getting discouraged about it. I'm really hoping it gets easier, but even if not, it's still worth the effort.
ohh that must be hard. I think I'd give up if it was that hard so I bow down to you on your effort. I hope you manage to find an easier way to do it.
Have you tried to find out in a LD if there is an easier way for you to do it? Maybe ask your subconsciousness eg DCs about it (if you can find a wise one).
Have you tried at all using visualisation of doing it successfully and easily, to try to improve your situation with this? eg at times when not actually trying to do this.. imagine yourself easily doing this.. and try to program into yourself that it is easy to do. (dont try to do it at these times... just program this idea into you).