So last night I was having wicked crazy dreams, and then suddenly I thought to look at my hands. Of course, there was 6 fingers and 1 thumb. So I knew I was dreaming. Then I pushed two fingers through my palm. I couldn't quite get them all the way through my hand, but because I had done that before and my hand just kinda turned to silly putty, stretching with the applied pressure, I knew that was a sure sign I was dreaming as well. So I told myself, I am dreaming. My body is in bed, at home. I did my best to force the realization to happen, so I could pop in. I rubbed my hands together, I told the dream to focus up, I demanded clarity. I struggled so hard to try to get my conscious mind to wake the hell up, just felt like a futile kind of blurry concentration on something uncertain, because my conscious mind wasn't quite awake and I was trying to make it come to! But no matter what I did, I could not POP into the dream. I still woke up afterwards and felt different, realizing I still wasn't fully lucid and aware in the dream. I couldn't become fully lucid, even though the dream had great stability, continuity and I took every measure I could think of to make myself pop in, and yet it was still a semi lucid where I couldn't quite fly and didn't get that vivid feeling or that immersive presence.
What happened? What do you guys think?
Striving to live free and enlightened in every way.