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Re: Being a Well Liked Person

Posted: 07 Jul 2014 06:42
by nesgirl

Re: Being a Well Liked Person

Posted: 07 Jul 2014 08:34
We also project feelings and emotions into dogs, cats, teddy bears, and even a volley ball we painted a face on and named, Wilson. (From the movie, Castaway, but good analogy).

The same goes for dream characters. It's in our human nature. What came first? It was our need for one that created it in the first place, not the other way around. (I'm still surprised by what they say and how they act, but why do we have people in dreams so often?) It's human nature... we are so social!

You might think you aren't but hey, you're here on this website and meeting new people aren't you. ;)

But ask yourself this: What is a fight when it's only words? It's nice to have adversaries and rivals, but they are not enemies. (I have a different perspective, that's all).

Re: Being a Well Liked Person

Posted: 07 Jul 2014 09:25
I'll add this:

I too don't bring up my lucid dreams at the dinner table or around the water cooler discussions. ( I felt like others didn't understand and I felt like an outcast too, so yea, I agree and I learned to hold back. They weren't my enemies, just idiots! ;) )

But on a forum like this, anything goes and we're all friends here. 8-)

(We totally went off tangent from the main topic and OP, but whatever).

Re: Being a Well Liked Person

Posted: 07 Jul 2014 17:50
by nesgirl

Re: Being a Well Liked Person

Posted: 08 Jul 2014 11:44
by Snaggle
Summerland on topic
Just be yourself. I hardly ever talk to strangers. Most of the time I just think of people as noisy furniture, especially on crowded buses, and when they are young and stupid and I just want them to shut the fuck up....Yeah, you also don't want to come across as a bleating pain in the ass. Moreover, think about what could happen if you strike up a conversation with some psychopath who develops an unhealthy obsession with you. Socialising in this manner can be a great boon in widening your network and enriching conviviality, but it invites a greater possibility of danger, too. ...Unfortunately, our world is not uncorrupted. It is multicoloured with personalities with all sorts of hidden agendas. The introvert is safer than the extrovert in the same manner that the monogamist is safer than the polygamist, and, if your friend one day realises this, he may want to be more like you. I'm sorry if I sound cynical but I am only trying to be realistic here. Perhaps save your keen, forthcoming side for those occasions when you may wish to seduce your "object" of attraction. (And pick wisely.)

Never mind being well liked! If this becomes your main focus you will drive yourself insane. Do what comes natural to you instead of trying to live to entertain others.

* Point one: yes Summerland you're cold and have dehumanized others and shown at the same time what's wrong with that. Point two: Psychopaths are generally just going to ignore one if one is warm towards them – they're both cold and malicious and think of them as just objects. It's pretty unlikely that a relationship will be formed with them or that they'll become obsessed with someone else. Point three: knowledge is power, socializing with others allows one to detect their strengths and weaknesses. This knowledge allows one to avoid their strengths and manipulate them into situations where their weaknesses will become critical traps that defeat, destroy or ruin them. The person who does not socialize with his enemies is the one who is not “safe”. I agree with Sun Tzu [if one knows oneself and one's enemies one does not need to fear defeat in a hundred battles]. Point five: one does not even know if there is any chemistry between you and a member of the opposite sex unless one socializes and flirts with them – that socializing and flirting builds desire and affection in both parties too.

Isn't it funny that this mentality about animals being good no matter what still prevails in this day and age. A crocodile bites a man's arm off in a zoo and nothing happens to the animal (and it shouldn't because it is in its nature to attack). The victim might even live to tell the tale and laugh about it later with his friends whilst feeding the very same croc at the zoo! If a psychotic human maims an unfortunate soul, the corollary of the situation is quite different. Despite being a victim of his brain physiology, the deranged individual is ostracised. (And often punished in order to give the rest of the community a false sense of justice.)

Not too long ago [August 1, 1966] there was a guy called Charles [Witman](I forget his second name) who went on a killing spree in America. He had murdered his wife, kids, and parents [he murdered his mother, then his wife and then 16 random strangers at his university in Texas]. He was out of control and the media surely labelled him a monster. Eventually, the police executed him [ he died in a shootout with three police officers who attempted to sneak up on him ]. But here is a profound twist: a suicide letter was found on him. (He knew he was going to be killed.)[he left this note with his mother's body] The letter explained that he could not account for his behaviour and that he loved his family very much. He felt that there was something wrong with him and requested for an autopsy to be performed on his cadaver, stressing that his brain should be studied. When they finally opened his brain, a tumour was found to be pushing against his amygdala (the centre of our emotions) [it was found between the occipital and temporal lobes – no where near the amygala . The minute you learn that the killer was a victim of his physiology is when you realise that he is not truly culpable and the massacre should be viewed as nothing but a terrible accident where many perished. Just something to ponder over... ...I would also argue that nobody can truly be held accountable for anything because there is no such thing as free will. (But this is another topic.) Even the psychos who are tumour-free are victims of their own brain chemistry which they did not pick. So, control is illusory.

*Summerland this is a scientific hoax, not different than the old hoax that moths turned black by soot being an example of modern evolution. Witman was on and a chronic abuser of Dexedrine/Dextroamphetamine [eating them like popcorn according to a friend], a drug known to have these side effects: bipolar like affects with swings between euphoria and depression; anxiety and paranoia; delusions and hallucinations; also to cause headaches. He before his murder spree was known: to have criminal tendencies [he was a deer poacher]; to be a second generation wife beater and to have violent thoughts of mass murder. Hint, Summerland, all habitual hunters have had impulses to play “the most dangerous game” (aka hunt humans). Considering that he had both a criminal and evil, he had nothing opposed to those impulses and decided to act them out. When one combines this with his chronic drug abuse one needs no other explanation of his behavior. Also, men whom beats their wives don't love them. Love makes one gentle and affectionate towards its object.

In fact, what you decide to do in a lucid dream is constrained by urges that you did not author. Such impulses arise from your unconscious side and their origin are often unknown to the self. You may decide what you decide but you don't get to decide what you are going to decide. You can't even predict what you will be thinking next (and I bet you couldn't predict all your responses to my posts either prior to having been exposed to them). All of this just proves my point: there is no free will....If you don't believe me, you can refer to Libet's experiments where the relevant motor parts of the brain activate before an individual becomes aware of deciding to move a limb. If you still insist that free will is not an illusion and that the universe is not deterministic dure to cause and effect, then give me a genuine example of free will seen as this subject is appearing to be apropos to the topic. (Bear in mind that you did not pick your genome, your family, your gender, your ethnic origin, your life's events which influenced you etc.) Ultimately, I contend that we cannot truly be blamed for anything just as praise is not ours to take for "our" achievements. The authorship belongs to the Big Bang that set everything in motion in this universe.

* Summerland this is truly sad, you've dehumanized yourself just as you've dehumanized others. One needs to gain knowledge of oneself to gain what freedom there is of will. Everything one does is something one has chosen to to and ones entire mind is plastic and can be molded into any form one desires. Any lucid dreamer potentially has more knowledge of themselves and experiences that can lead to changes caused by the environment or by genetic personality programs. It does not matter whether free will or determinism is correct – one is never a robot following programs unless one has chosen to be one. One become free and pure when one loves oneself. Genuine self-love is as vital morality as the love of others. Those without it betray themselves to act out their self-hate (aka guilt) and then further act it out by remorse where they punish themselves – LOL be true to oneself and change oneself if one makes a mistake!
We'll see how long it will last. There are a couple of users who hate me already on here (not saying who they are). Not that I am anti-friendship, it is just that I tend to make enemies a lot easier than I make friends, and I really don't care for having more enemies to deal with, and I would rather avoid making friends than have more enemies to deal with.

* I doubt that anyone hates you at this site. Almost everyone is mature and rational here. One has to be extremely immature to hate someone because of anything they say at a forum.

Re: Being a Well Liked Person

Posted: 09 Jul 2014 19:02
by Summerlander
Thank you for your input, Snaggle! I only deem it worthwhile, however, to address two points that you've made... :)

The first is about the illusion of free will. The absence of free will does not, in any way, dehumanise us. And if you look deeper into this subject, you will realise that free will is simply an incoherent concept. I will leave you here with something to think about:

"The laws of nature do not strike most of us as incompatible with free will because we have not imagined how human action would appear if all cause-and-effect relationships were understood." - Sam Harris

The second is about Charles Whitman (thanks for reminding me of his name but your info is incorrect and a "friend's" testimony, if there ever was one, is unreliable and therefore unscientific to assume it is true). And no, the case is most certainly not a "scientific hoax." (Where did you hear that?) :D

"Post-mortem autopsy of his brain revealed a glioblastoma multiforme tumor the size of a walnut, erupting from beneath the thalamus, impacting the hypothalamus, extending into the temporal lobe and compressing the amygdaloid nucleus (Charles J. Whitman Catastrophe, Medical Aspects. Report to Governor, 9/8/66)."

Oh, before I forget, about psychopaths you said:

Psychopaths are generally just going to ignore one if one is warm towards them – they're both cold and malicious and think of them as just objects. It's pretty unlikely that a relationship will be formed with them or that they'll become obsessed with someone else.

Really!!!? So you think they don't exhibit predatory behaviour and have a tendency to guilt-trip altruistic individuals to their advantage? :mrgreen:

Re: Being a Well Liked Person

Posted: 09 Jul 2014 19:12
I keep saying I'm just an "Organic Machine" too and liken myself to a robot.

I am just chemistry of amino acids, protein chains, and hormones... etc..... Sounds dehumanizing, but that's only when I sit back and think logically. But I realize I am not logical most of the time and even admit I'm a hypocrite at times, but hey, aren't we all.

I'm only human. ;)

Re: Being a Well Liked Person

Posted: 09 Jul 2014 19:20
by Summerlander
The truth may sound dehumanising but it all depends on how you look at it. I think its beautiful that a peculiar and complex arrangement of molecules gave rise to the harmony that we find in humanity which continues to develop. The scientific truth does not take away our humanity and morality in any way, it simply shows us our true nature but our reality (as we choose to see it - or should I say conditioned to see it seen as there is no free will :mrgreen: ) remains intact. ;)

Re: Being a Well Liked Person

Posted: 09 Jul 2014 19:28
I edited because I wanted to word it right. I'll say this about Sociopaths, because I've met a few and some are in my own family.

They aren't all killers (that is a stereotype), but they have no empathy. In fact they actually relish in breaking people down and making them cry and walk away in victory and it makes them feel good like they conquered somebody. All tears they shed are 'crocodile tears'. They are always scheming, and put on a fake face like a social chameleon.

I didn't want to go into specifics, but I've had some first hand experience with one growing up.... (ok, it was my own brother from another mother, my step brother) And his mother is like that too, and it goes to show it's genetic.

But I'm still a damn fool and love him even though I haven't seen him in 5 years......

(Irrational human, hey, I'm only human!) ;)

With that said, Psychopath and Sociopath are similar, if not the same, and I feel I have some first hand experience, and for some reason blurted about my personal life. This 'friendship' thing is getting to me!

Re: Being a Well Liked Person

Posted: 09 Jul 2014 19:42
by Summerlander
Sociopaths (or psychopaths - even though some make distinctions between these two terms they can still be used interchangeably) are more common than what people think. (Most of us have unknowingly come across a few.) Serial killers reside in the extreme end of the spectrum. I have also had unpleasant experiences with one. They are unable to feel empathy, feel no moral obligation to those around them, and great excitement can be experienced from being cruel to others. All are highly egotistical or narcissistic.

Many are social chameleons in order to "survive." Despite the obvious brain deficits, they are natural and considered sane. Recidivism is higher in such individuals, too. It is hard not to interpret them as "bad people" or "evil" when they reveal the extremely uncalled for actions that they are capable of. But it is in their nature to be inimical, unkind, uncaring. Their brain physiology dictates it. They are natural. Period. :twisted:

Oh, and they are not very well liked people once you see their true colours. Unless, of course, it's Dexter being cold and unkind to killers and giving them a taste of their own medicine... :D