Repressed sexuality? Dream interpretation?

A place to share and analyze your dreams (lucid or otherwise) to better understand your dreams' subconscious symbolism.
monsterman01
Posts: 1
Joined: 26 Oct 2015 07:52

Repressed sexuality? Dream interpretation?

Postby monsterman01 » 26 Oct 2015 09:01

I suffer from HOCD, and I'm homophobic. Before you start ranting remember this, its not my fault I was raised this way, so dont say it's not their choice cos its not mine either. But, this is a dreaming forum so ill talk about my dreams. I will number each dream like this 'DREAM 1', 'DREAM 2', 'DREAM 3' ETC. ok so here goes:
DREAM 1 THIS WAS 1 YEAR BEFORE I HAD HOCD
It was a gay sex dream. I heard they're pretty normal but in my case it's scaring me. The only one I can remember is, one where I was giving a handjob to an unknown stranger in a toilet stall,I might've had more dreams like this but I dont remember. I wasnt disgusted in my dream but was scared after I woke up. Even though I wasnt getting a handjob I almost ejaculated in realife.The dream was short around probably 5-10 seconds that I can remember. I almost finished but never had a wet dream, in other words I woke up just when I was about to finish, like all my other dreams.

DREAM 2
I was having a threesome (I think. If not one girl who I might've known/seen only) with 2 girl and I was giving oral sex. This one is self explanatory. This was also 1 year before my HOCD around the same time as the other dream.

DREAM 3
This one is recent (after my HOCD), I was in a dark room (likely a toilet) with this woman who was my teacher years ago. I was thinking in my dream if I should or shouldnt rape her and I did. This wasnt the only one, I had a few others where I raped a woman, but dont remember them.

DREAM 4 BEFORE HOCD
I was having anal sex with this woman (i'm pretty sure she was a woman, I dont remember though but its very likely she was), in a dark room with a fire/torch thing lighting the room. There was also an unknown guy standing next to me (I think). Im not sure if this one was rape.

DREAM 5
I had a dream where I was unbuttoning my shirt, and there was another one where I was taking off my trousers. There was also probably one where my dad was taking off his clothes obviously not with me.

DREAM 6 AFTER HOCD
When I had/still have-ish HOCD one of my compulsions was watching gay porn. Keep in mind gay things were the only things that used to go through my mind then. Anyways, I initally started off with straight porn and was masturbating, but in my dream my compulsion kicked in and I switched to gay porn and I think I was disgusted but I tried to switch back to straight but my screen froze, and eventually I gave in and even had that feeling of giving in and started masturbating to the gay porn. I had a few dreams where I was masturbating, a 1-3 after HOCD and I dont know how many before. I also one woke up masturbating,not sure though

DREAM 7
I still had HOCD then and I was surrounded by shirtless men and I dont remember well but I think they were trying to make a move on me.I was aware that was a dream (ithink) and thats when I first had the giving in feeling.

DREAM 8
I was massacaring a school,in the form of a video game I was playing.

DREAM 9
This guy I dont like, and had a fight with, said to me he bisexual.

I never finished a wet dream and always woke up. I identify as a straight male. I am 13 years of age.

Sme of the dreams I lucid dreamt, in others I did not. I dont remember anything from the ones before HOCD that might have triggered the dream but I do know the reasons for the ones after. Feel free to ask me any questions about any of the dreams.

I dont know if dream interpretation is real and I know ill get a lot of biased answers saying its true, but what proof do you have?Is it realiable? Is there a difference between dream symbols and interpretation? If so,what? Why dont I finish my dreams? Is every dream due to some stupid, fruedian theory of unconciousness? Couldnt thinking of something repeatedly cause a dream other than some moronic theory of unconcious mind blah blah blah?

I say that because on most of the days, I had those dreams, it was something I though about earlier that day. For E.g the massacare thing, I was playing a video game exactly like that earlier. The bisexual thing.Earlier that DAYthought maybe im not gay,I have hocd and at the very most im bisexual. Those are just few of them; many times I had dreams based on my waking life thoughts. Oh yeah, and if the gay dreams and the masturbation thing have a secret hidden meaning, how come I only had them a few times before but after getting HOCD I had A LOT of them in a row. Same thing with the masturbation; the day I found out about it, the EXACT same day I dreamt of that.

I'm not going to act like a know it all,unlike a lot of people I met online. I admit I DONT know much about this mainly because of the lack of information online. PLEASE if you dont know anything about this then DONT guess and make things up. Im looking for solid, hard facts here, not a load of BS. So interpret my dreams, answer any question I asked and be helpful. Also feel free to ask me anything that will help you interpret. Just drop it in with your answer and I will PM you.

P.S Is dreammoods and sites like that legit dream interpreters or are the made up "horoscopic" kind of things?

Nickfan40
Posts: 182
Joined: 17 Aug 2014 03:08

Re: Repressed sexuality? Dream interpretation?

Postby Nickfan40 » 18 Jan 2016 23:28

I'm a straight 40-year-old woman that did not get the physical affection from my father that I needed growing up. I was brought up to think that sex was dirty and not to have it until I'm married. When I was about 11 years old, I found my 22-year-old sister's PlayGirl magazines, giggling at the men's penises, and my mom heard, catching me at it. She made me feel terrible about it, saying she'd never seen "a man" until she was older; up til then, I'd only seen *clinical* pictures of men and women. I've had dreams about having sex with both women and men, but they don't scare me.

Sometimes I just have the imagery of sex in dreams like knives, snakes, needles that are phallic, and I'm disappointed that I didn't get to have sex with anyone. Here are the titles of my dreams of a sexual nature (or just kissing is involved) on this site

A screwed-up dream about Robert Englund
sex, but not really sex, dreams
Pseudo-sex with Professor Petrie
Sex with a beautiful actress
A healing dream

I'll get back to you with some more later.

jasmine2
Posts: 402
Joined: 15 Sep 2013 04:42

Re: Repressed sexuality? Dream interpretation?

Postby jasmine2 » 16 Feb 2016 03:53

Monsterman01,
I'll bet you are more of a Teddy bear than a monsterman. Your post deals with a very important emotional and self-identity issue. I may get wordy in my reply.

It is my understanding that obsessive-compulsive disorder is related to an imbalance in brain chemistry, which triggers repeated, often irrational, thoughts about some perceived threat, and the belief that it is necessary to perform some ritual act to guard against this threat. This cycle of behavior often significantly interferes with the activities of daily life.

Treatment usually involves behavioral exposure and response conditioning, and often medications to help reduce anxiety.

You say you were taught strong anti-gay prejudices when you were growing up. So, it may not be so "irrational" that you feel confusion and anxiety about having homosexual fantasies and dreams.

One factor may be that "the wisdom behind the dreaming" is now urging you to challenge anti-gay prejudices and stereotypes. Then it may be less stressful for you to decide if you are more genuinely gay or straight.

Fortunately, as more people come out as gay, in our society, many of their relatives, friends, class-mates, and co-workers come to realize, "Hey, he (or she) is a good and honorable person, just trying to deal with life like most everybody else."

I recommend the following resources. -

(1) Article - "How Do I Know I'm Not Really Gay? - by Fred Penzel, PhD
- iocd.org - International OCD Foundation

(2) Website - Health Journeys - healthjourneys.com
Guided imagery CDs, MP3s, and blog
I suggest (In category "Addictions and compulsive behavior) - CDs
- "Relieve Stress" and ""Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder"
(Select options - Click "audio sample")

- Article - "What Is Guided Imagery?" - healthjourneys.com

I will give additional recommendations in a follow-up reply.

jasmine2
Posts: 402
Joined: 15 Sep 2013 04:42

Re: Repressed sexuality? Dream interpretation?

Postby jasmine2 » 16 Feb 2016 04:32

I will continue my above reply and recommend additional resources -

(3) Article - "The Boy Who Didn't Know Who He Was (Teen Obsession About Homosexuality"
- by Fred Penzel PhD - wsps.info/index - WSPS

(4) e-Book - "On-line Dream Work Training Manual II" by Jeremy Taylor - blurb.com
Click "Preview" - (View all 74 pages free. Click on page to turn pages.)
See especially sections - pg. 14 - "Projection" - pg. 63 - "Same Sex Dreams"
(Includes many creative illustrations)

(5) Article - "Feeding Your Demons"/ Tricycle - tricycle.com - by Tsultrim Allione
Tibetan Buddhist "Chod" visualization.

(I suggest) - Practice imagining that you are Both partners in a sexual relationship. If any anxious feelings arise, calmly acknowledge them, then let them go and send them in the Sun, where they are absorbed and transformed into creative energy, warm and light.

(6) Article - "The Wild Reed: Song Of Songs: The Bible's Gay Love Poem?" - thewildreed.blogspot.com

(7) The popular, unconventional TV series, "Transparent" (Amazon Prime) presents a supportive, insightful view of people who identify as transgendered.

(8) Article - "Dreamspeak - An Interview With Beverly D'Urso: A Lucid Dreamer" - durso.org
Beverly discusses her extensive experiences with lucid dreams, including references to her numerous sexual dreams with a wide variety of sexual partners.

(9) - Article - "Putting Abominations In Perspective" - by Linda A. Malcor - dragonlords.net.com

(My comment) Many people who profess to believe in a literal translation of the Bible tend to freak out about prohibitions related to sex, but they ignore dozens of other "abominations".

- YouTube - "GOP Hopefuls Speak At Anti-Gay Conference/ Rachel Madow/ MSNBC
(Alert! Fire and Brimstone) - A minister presents a theatrical performance of a fire-breathing dragon with a heart of frozen stone. Apparently, he has never read the teachings of Jesus about compassion.

(10) - As a peaceful and healing alternative to many voices of intolerance, prejudice, and fear, in the world, I recommend the open-hearted poems of the 13th century, Sufi mystic, Rumi.

Example -
Be certain that in the religion of Love
There are not believers and unbelievers
Love embraces All

- Search - Rumi Quotes (The Essential Rumi) - Goodreads - goodreads.com

- Article - "Walking Around In The Heart - Coleman Barks On Rumi, Sexuality, And The Path With No Name" by Andrew Lawler - the sunmagazine.org

- YouTube - "Rumi and the Play of Poetry" (University of California Television)

-- Best Wishes - jasmine2

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Summerlander
Posts: 4197
Joined: 22 Sep 2011 19:52

Re: Repressed sexuality? Dream interpretation?

Postby Summerlander » 17 Feb 2016 19:31

monsterman01 wrote:I suffer from HOCD, and I'm homophobic.


What do you fear--or find repulsive--about homosexuals?

monsterman01 wrote:Before you start ranting remember this, its not my fault I was raised this way, so dont say it's not their choice cos its not mine either.


It's not your fault ... but it's not their choice either. :mrgreen:

monsterman01 wrote:It was a gay sex dream. I heard they're pretty normal but in my case it's scaring me. The only one I can remember is, one where I was giving a handjob to an unknown stranger in a toilet stall,I might've had more dreams like this but I dont remember. I wasnt disgusted in my dream but was scared after I woke up. Even though I wasnt getting a handjob I almost ejaculated in realife.The dream was short around probably 5-10 seconds that I can remember. I almost finished but never had a wet dream, in other words I woke up just when I was about to finish, like all my other dreams.


Are you bisexual?

monsterman01 wrote: DREAM 3
This one is recent (after my HOCD), I was in a dark room (likely a toilet) with this woman who was my teacher years ago. I was thinking in my dream if I should or shouldnt rape her and I did. This wasnt the only one, I had a few others where I raped a woman, but dont remember them.


If you dream about raping people then you must think about raping people. Are you a rapist?

monsterman01 wrote:I identify as a straight male. I am 13 years of age.


Or your mummy and daddy urged you to like girls against what I suspect to be your nature. 13? You're a pruning baby, mate ... :lol:

monsterman01 wrote:I'm not going to act like a know it all,unlike a lot of people I met online. I admit I DONT know much about this mainly because of the lack of information online. PLEASE if you dont know anything about this then DONT guess and make things up. Im looking for solid, hard facts here, not a load of BS. So interpret my dreams, answer any question I asked and be helpful. Also feel free to ask me anything that will help you interpret. Just drop it in with your answer and I will PM you.


Hard facts: your dreams can have whatever meaning you want them to have against your waking life and your state of mind. Objectively, your dreams could just be cerebral software cacophony ... mental 'white noise'. :ugeek:

monsterman01 wrote:P.S Is dreammoods and sites like that legit dream interpreters or are the made up "horoscopic" kind of things?


'Horoscopic' BS. For proper, mundane dream interpretation, look at dream research by qualified psychologists. 8-)
"Empty cognizance of one taste, suffused with knowing, is your unmistaken nature, the uncontrived original state. when not altering what is, allow it to be as it is, and the awakened state is right now spontaneously present."

- Padmasambhava

Nickfan40
Posts: 182
Joined: 17 Aug 2014 03:08

Re: Repressed sexuality? Dream interpretation?

Postby Nickfan40 » 18 Mar 2016 16:21

I've had one lesbian dream; it's called, Sex with A Beautiful Actress. I even had a dream where I think I was "raping" a man. It was called, Pseudo sex with Professor Petrie.

I had a dream just the other night about being rejected by Herbert Lom as he's playing the "nutsy" Chief Inspector Charles Dreyfus. I didn't have the heart to "rape" him in that one, though. I would love to "distract" him from wanting to kill Clouseau, though! In all the dreams I've had about him, we've never really had sex.

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SunTzu
Posts: 47
Joined: 08 Sep 2015 07:19

Re: Repressed sexuality? Dream interpretation?

Postby SunTzu » 29 Mar 2016 00:22

Sexually perverted dreams are nothing to worry about. A lot of different interpretations as to what they can mean, but in the end we all have some slight bisexual tendencies. Sometimes the body doesn't distinguish well between male and female, other times it doesn't really care very much.

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deschainXIX
Posts: 890
Joined: 07 Aug 2013 18:18
Location: Virginia, USA

Re: Repressed sexuality? Dream interpretation?

Postby deschainXIX » 29 Mar 2016 02:12

I think everyone--except for a small minority of highly self-aware people--labor beneath subconscious sexual repressions and even perversions that are never realized by the conscious mind. I know it's cliché, but I'm very sympathetic to Freud's ideas in this way.

I think homophobes are additionally more likely to have and struggle with repressed homosexual urges. Read Nathaniel Hawthorne. Sexual repression (or repression of any sort) inevitably leads to sexual perversion. Why do Islamic rape cultures that require women to cover every inch of their skin produce such sexually violent and compulsive young men?

I think everyone, at the very least, should be open to experimentation. If you draw lines in the sand in your mind, it may be an indication that you're nurturing a hidden fetish for the object against which you've set limitations for yourself.

But don't take me too seriously. I love radically counter-intuitive psychological theories. :mrgreen:

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Well said.

Enra Traz
Posts: 310
Joined: 28 Nov 2014 10:55

Re: Repressed sexuality? Dream interpretation?

Postby Enra Traz » 29 Mar 2016 02:17

You pervert. :twisted:

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deschainXIX
Posts: 890
Joined: 07 Aug 2013 18:18
Location: Virginia, USA

Re: Repressed sexuality? Dream interpretation?

Postby deschainXIX » 29 Mar 2016 02:39

I should have added "largely unsubstantiated" to my description of these counter-intuitive psychological theories. :D

Also, I recall someone saying something about sucking "old men's cocks"? Or was that Summerlander and not Traz? In any case, I think we all know who the real pervert is. :mrgreen:

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Well said.


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